In the last week, I have had to resign from more jobs than I have in my entire life. I was sad to see one go, excited to let the other go, and the third I would have loved to have put more time into. However, this means I will have one (and only one!) job for the foreseeable future. This has not been the case in... ever.
September flew by, and now October is so demanding that it's slipping through the cracks too. In the next two weeks, I'm supposed to find someplace to live, move in, and start a brand new job. I am way excited about all of that for many reasons, but every once in a while I panic about the fact that I haven't found a place yet, about how to make my preferences and my budget cooperate, and about how I will have no friends in this new town.
How often do I feel overwhelmed with anxiety for this or that? I let it get to me, I really do. Until I take a few minutes (or more) and actually clear my mind--I mean get to a point where my mind and body are still. Sometimes it takes minutes, other times it takes days, but I always make it back. And when I do, when I feel alive, when I open myself up to the Lord and allow myself to hear him respond, I find a peace in the midst of the commotion. (That's right, the hecticness is not gone, but I am at peace with it.) It is then that I reexamine what I am doing, how I'm doing it, and I press on with my whole self realigned, and with my heart, mind, and ears wide open.
I am, right now, in the process of clearing my mind. It always baffles me how far I can trudge in my own direction, before realizing there is a better way.
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